Happy like a fool

Name that song.  I’m living with anthems in my life these days… this one in particular is so, SO FITTING!

I woke up this morning starving..in much need of protein for a run I plan on taking as soon as I finish this post.  My running buddies (shoe 1 and shoe 2) are sitting next to me with sad laces wondering why they haven’t hit the pavement or even the treadmill belt in over two weeks (actually, I think they are furious with me for missing the 1/2 marathon I intended to do last weekend).  Poor things have been shoved off to the side since I’ve been a little too busy living the good life, loving the good life–these dreams of mine that are too real of a reality.

The good life last week consisted of butterflies, and family time, and chocolate chip cookies.  The good life two days ago consisted of dancing around with my 3 year old niece wearing a princess crown and sunglasses so the monsters couldn’t see us.  And… the good life consisted of me landing my first, real “deal” with a lobbying firm in DC (something that if you told me I would do 10 years ago, I would have said, “yaaa, okay……”)  My goodness, this has gotta be the good life, this could really be the good life.

I loved my niece since before she was born, I loved this girl.  When she was an alien looking baby that cried and peed on me, I was so crazy about this girl.  When she bawled for hours when I was baby sitting her, I still loved this girl (I say that now, but you probably shouldn’t have asked me that night…).  The point is I love her!  I remember the feelings (kind of) when I first saw her; slimy, wrinkly, and newborn- ish.  I was speechless.  In my entire life, I don’t think that has ever happened to me.  Seriously, ask anyone.  I couldn’t even find the words to pray.  (this coming from a girl who is brutally honest with God during the worst of times and unfiltered in the best of times.)  I was literally speechless and overwhelmed with thoughts and visions in my head as I beheld this beautiful gift from above: I imagined us playing “princesses” in her room and spinning around until we got dizzy.  I saw us laying in bed telling stories to each other.  I believed in the love that only an aunt and niece can feel, the kind I had with Aunt Be no matter what my teenage angst or childish independence might have conveyed.  It is a special kind of love, significant and noteworthy.  It’s real.

“Auntie ‘Cole, you want to wear my princess crown?  Auntie ‘Cole, put on these glasses!  We have to spin in circles so that we’ll turn into princesses.” <insert dizziness, gut wrenching laughter, and love, lots and lots of love here>

 

that love was busting at the seams!

“Auntie ‘Cole, quick, get under the covers with me so the monsters can’t find us.  We have to hide.  Don’t take off the glasses.  DON’T” <insert a piece of childhood I had forgotten here>

I have two favorites about this photo: Amari’s genuine smile….and my “chiclet” teeth.

“Auntie ‘Cole, will you just lie here and snuggle with me while I go to sleep…I can’t sleep because I can smell Adelie’s poop.”  Adelie, her baby sister, my god-daughter and another good life.

I believe in answered prayers; in the strength of God’s Truth.  I’m reminded that the smallest, most faint of dreams can come to life simply because they were the desire of my heart.  God saw, God gave, God moves.  I see success coming my way, left behind in the dust of my moving feet.  It’s a beautiful thing to seek, wait, and behold the way He moves–there’s no denying His presence, especially in the sound of a child’s laughter, especially in a restored heart and spirit.  He is so there, behold Him.  Behold this good life from Him..and then just love it.

When you’re happy like a fool…let Him take you over.

 

 

let's behold

@nicolebeholds

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