I Don’t Want this Night to End

I’m having an imaginary love affair with a very hot man.  He’s tall.  He has scruff.  And I swear he must LOVE the dentist with those pearly whites.  His name is Luke Bryan.  And his song inspires me; so much that I’ve worn my Justin boots about 3 times this past week.

YOU GOT YOUR HANDS UP
YOU’RE ROCKING IN MY TRUCK
YOU’VE GOT THE RADIO ON
YOU’RE SINGING EVERY SONG.

I’M SET ON CRUISE CONTROL
I’M SLOWLY LOOSING HOPE
OF EVERYTHING I’VE GOT,
YOU’RE LOOKING SO DAMN HOT.  <–THAT’S ESPECIALLY ME….

AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT ROAD WE’RE ON,
OR WHERE WE’VE BEEN.
FROM STARING AT YOU,
GIRL, ALL I KNOW IS I DON’T WANT THIS NIGHT TO END.

Freeeee as a bird (a green one like the ones that live on my curtains in my office).  I’ve spent the last week weeping (perhaps I should have quoted a song by “the weepies”).  That may come in later….but the point is, I know this is all part of “it”.

I feel like four years have come and gone in an instant.  My first group of 8th graders, are graduating in June.  They’re getting their college acceptance letters.  And my group of eighth graders now are gettting their braces off.  My 7th graders can pray out loud now, and my kids that are now sophmores are leading small groups.  And me, I’m remembering it all, like a nostalgic baby.

We went out after youth group this week, like we always do to celebrate the Spirit moving (OH AND HE WAS MOVING!!).  I sat there…and yes, again I weeped telling my volunteers, “the work you do matters!  You’ve changed the kids’ lives, but know (SNIFF, SNIFF, and maybe a little snort too) you’ve changed my life too.”  And then they laughed at me…but continued to support me.  Insert Josh Groban song here (You raiiissseee meeee upppppp, so I can stand on mountains…)

So then I woke up Thursday thinking, here’s the weepies “Can’t steal happiness.”  I had lunch with a student, not just any student, NOAH!  Noah makes me laugh, perhaps the most honest and real student.  Seriously, HONEST; when he was 11 he told me I smelled.  (I need to add that he meant he “knew” my smell… OF PURFUME.. and liked it).  This kid makes me laugh, and mixed with Justin, I have sore abs.  They make me happy, and no, it can not, WILL NOT be stolen.  There is nothing I needed more this week that a lunch with him (and a surprise milk shake at work for Jus) to snap me back into reality.  My happiness WILL not be stolen! (remind me of that if it’s June and I’m still looking for a new job).

The devil is trying to steal my joy, and especially at the beginning of the week, he truly was.  But here’s the awesome part, I asked God to fight for me harder and He did.  Why does that surprise me?  I try so hard to find the special-ness in each day and it had stopped (even if it was only for a few days).  Why?!  This is an exciting time in my life.  YES, I did buy a ticket to Alaska.  YES, I did change my hair color, get bangs, (and tried to) eat a peanut.  YES, I went skiing and it was BEAUTIFUL.  We sat on the deck at the lodge drinking hot chocolate and watching HUGE snowflakes fall on the warm winter night.  Last night, my family came over and we laughed, we had a blast, and.. now, I have to go clean my kitchen soon.  But the point is, it’s a special time.  I’m grown up now (despite my little phase of trying not to).

THIS is something that I don’t want to end!  I want to throw my hands up and fall backwards, singing at the top of my lungs: adventure.  I want someone to take a look at me and see that I’m about freedom and doing things for “me” to let others see what real happiness looks like.  And yeah, I want to look so damn hot while doing it (who wouldn’t??).

This is my glimpse of happiness.

celebration of life… happiness!

and speaking of the celebration of life…did I mention I met my godchild yesterday?

spurs fans in the making….happiness! oh yeah, and suckers too…

cousin love…happiness!

by the way, WHY?! did no one tell me I had two horns on my head…..

admiration from a younger one… happiness!

this beautiful couple is THE example of fun, married, couple..HAPPINESS! (and no, I did not just say that because Laura inspired me a few weeks ago, OR because she is a faithful blog reader).

and who doesn’t love cake..HOMEMADE carrot cake?!  HAPPINESS!

There are times when I don’t want the “night to end.”  but it does… and soon, this “night” at CPC will end too.  I really need to jump offline to get ready for church, my second to last Sunday (because next Sunday I’ll be in Key West with my besties).  To tell you the truth, I kind of woke up excited…but that’s my life for you, a freakin’ roller coaster…one that I hope doesn’t end for a long, LONG time….

let's behold

@nicolebeholds

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